Faith on the Go: Ep: 11: The Curse of Familiarity: Eli's Passive Leadership and Its Generational Impact"

WEBVTT

00:00:00.017 --> 00:00:06.377
Hello, and welcome back to Diary of a Black Woman podcast with our Faith on the Go series.

00:00:06.997 --> 00:00:11.697
We are continuing our Curse of Familiarity.

00:00:12.037 --> 00:00:15.797
Today's title is The Priests Who Forgot to Fear,

00:00:16.257 --> 00:00:23.897
Eli and the Danger of Passive Leadership While Allowing Compromise in Sacred

00:00:23.897 --> 00:00:27.297
Spaces Destroy Generations.

00:00:28.057 --> 00:00:32.037
Welcome to Faith on the Go with me, your host, Connie Morris,

00:00:32.217 --> 00:00:36.077
where we keep it real, raw, and rooted in the Word.

00:00:36.437 --> 00:00:42.237
If you ever looked the other way when something wasn't right in your home,

00:00:42.517 --> 00:00:47.177
if you ever stayed silent when God called you to speak up,

00:00:47.437 --> 00:00:59.057
or if you've grown numb in the very place you were once anointed to protect, This episode is for you.

00:00:59.477 --> 00:01:04.957
We're continuing our bold series, The Curse of Familiarity, and today we're

00:01:04.957 --> 00:01:08.297
diving into the story of Eli the priest,

00:01:08.537 --> 00:01:14.757
a man who served in the house of God but forgot how to fear him.

00:01:15.237 --> 00:01:19.617
Eli didn't commit the sin himself, but he refused to confront them,

00:01:19.817 --> 00:01:24.677
and because of his passivity, generations paid the price.

00:01:24.977 --> 00:01:29.997
So what happens when we get too comfortable with what's sacred?

00:01:30.337 --> 00:01:35.657
What happens when we allow disobedience in the name of keeping the peace?

00:01:35.857 --> 00:01:40.817
Let's talk about it. Because in 2025, we're not just attending church.

00:01:40.877 --> 00:01:44.937
We're being accountable for what happens in it.

00:01:45.917 --> 00:01:50.817
This is faith on the go. We'll talk, we'll growth, wherever you are.

00:01:50.817 --> 00:02:00.037
Let's turn to 1 Samuel 2, verses 12-17, 22-25, in chapter 3.

00:02:01.146 --> 00:02:05.506
Verse 13, Eli's son were scoundrels.

00:02:05.826 --> 00:02:12.026
They had no regard for the Lord. That's 1 Samuel 2.12.

00:02:12.286 --> 00:02:17.666
And we learned that scoundrels were belial, that they were acting like the devil.

00:02:18.086 --> 00:02:23.606
They were taking the sacrifices of the people, dishonoring God in the tabernacle.

00:02:23.926 --> 00:02:27.666
They slept with the women at the entrance to the tent of meetings.

00:02:27.946 --> 00:02:34.706
And everyone knew it, including Eli. But Eli only rebuked them. He didn't remove them.

00:02:34.966 --> 00:02:37.706
He warned them, but didn't act.

00:02:38.346 --> 00:02:42.086
In 1 Samuel 13, God says, I told him

00:02:42.086 --> 00:02:47.086
that I would judge his family forever because of the sin he knew about.

00:02:47.386 --> 00:02:55.306
His son blasphemy the God, and he failed to restrain them. Wow.

00:02:56.066 --> 00:02:59.106
God told you God is in the room.

00:02:59.106 --> 00:03:08.566
And so if God is in the room and he's watching and see if Eli will punish his sons, and then God says,

00:03:09.146 --> 00:03:15.446
I told him that I would judge his family forever because of the sin he knew about.

00:03:16.006 --> 00:03:21.226
His sons blaspheming God and he failed to restrain him.

00:03:21.646 --> 00:03:27.586
Eli became so used to being in the presence of God that he lost the fear of God.

00:03:27.586 --> 00:03:33.386
He allowed dishonor to live in his house because confronting it,

00:03:33.386 --> 00:03:36.926
it felt too costly. And here's that danger.

00:03:37.306 --> 00:03:41.086
Passive leadership breeds generational destruction.

00:03:41.806 --> 00:03:48.066
God didn't just judge Hophni and Phinehas. He judged Eli too.

00:03:49.166 --> 00:03:54.746
What family secrets are you holding that are protecting the children?

00:03:55.746 --> 00:04:00.706
You know the children are disobedient, not just to you, but to God.

00:04:01.146 --> 00:04:06.746
God is in the room. So God knows how you're protecting those children.

00:04:07.026 --> 00:04:12.506
That needs just discipline so that it will not curse the generation.

00:04:12.946 --> 00:04:21.406
And we know the story that Havni and Phinehas, that since Eli couldn't do the

00:04:21.406 --> 00:04:25.226
punishment, guess what? God did and they died.

00:04:26.434 --> 00:04:31.634
Right where they worked, you know. And a lot of times when I'm seeing,

00:04:31.874 --> 00:04:36.994
hearing about death and where people die, it's like when you know your children

00:04:36.994 --> 00:04:41.254
are being disobedient, it's best for you to check them.

00:04:42.354 --> 00:04:48.434
Correct them, discipline them, talk to them, do what you can to stop them.

00:04:48.834 --> 00:04:53.514
Because if it goes way too far into this blasphemy in the Lord,

00:04:53.814 --> 00:04:55.954
God will respect his name.

00:04:56.434 --> 00:05:00.074
He will not allow his name to be mocked.

00:05:00.474 --> 00:05:04.754
He will not allow that. They're sleeping with the women at the church.

00:05:05.034 --> 00:05:09.394
Think about that. If you are a pastor or you're a pastor's wife,

00:05:09.514 --> 00:05:15.414
because this is usually a women's podcast, but if you know that's happening

00:05:15.414 --> 00:05:17.994
in the church and you do nothing,

00:05:18.714 --> 00:05:23.114
remember his sons not only died, but he died.

00:05:23.934 --> 00:05:28.054
Remember, all that whole family, it says forever.

00:05:28.354 --> 00:05:33.694
You won't hear about that family. They're not having kids' generation that tell their story.

00:05:33.874 --> 00:05:36.734
That family was wiped out. That's it.

00:05:37.334 --> 00:05:44.514
You know, I hear stories on the news about how a mother loses mostly all their

00:05:44.514 --> 00:05:46.594
sons in some crazy incident.

00:05:46.874 --> 00:05:52.714
Maybe shooting or just fluke incidents. Because something is going on in that home.

00:05:53.794 --> 00:06:01.434
That has to be rooted out. Remember, the male carries the seed and the generation may be cursed.

00:06:02.114 --> 00:06:08.454
We don't want to always talk about that. And so you know that kids are off doing something wrong.

00:06:08.954 --> 00:06:11.914
Got it in the room. You better talk to God about it.

00:06:12.434 --> 00:06:18.854
Because God has a way of changing the hearts of the children.

00:06:19.874 --> 00:06:24.894
Eli is the first person that has the opportunity to change it.

00:06:25.274 --> 00:06:30.594
He kept those kids, his sons, still knowing what they were doing at the altar,

00:06:30.714 --> 00:06:33.374
the holy altar of God. He kept them there.

00:06:33.654 --> 00:06:39.454
He could have removed them and says, Okay, you guys are disrespecting the Lord.

00:06:39.774 --> 00:06:42.714
You can go do something else in the church like mop the floors.

00:06:42.914 --> 00:06:47.714
You do not get to be at the altar serving the holy church.

00:06:48.300 --> 00:06:53.280
Sacrifices. That will no longer be your responsibility. But many times,

00:06:53.320 --> 00:06:55.300
we don't want our kids mad at us.

00:06:55.560 --> 00:07:00.860
But many times, they need to be mad at us because we're saving their lives.

00:07:01.460 --> 00:07:07.340
We're forcing them to grow up. You know, we want to keep this peace and keep our kids happy.

00:07:07.820 --> 00:07:12.160
When we were kids, we weren't happy. Our mom and dad made us grow up.

00:07:12.280 --> 00:07:14.660
We were uncomfortable all the time.

00:07:14.900 --> 00:07:17.180
If you remember, we forget.

00:07:17.560 --> 00:07:22.380
And then we want to always comfort our children and not tell them the truth.

00:07:23.020 --> 00:07:28.500
You know, we need to do that, especially if you are a pastor's wife in the church

00:07:28.500 --> 00:07:33.740
and you see some stuff going on that you know that doesn't honor God,

00:07:33.940 --> 00:07:35.260
especially with the kids.

00:07:35.480 --> 00:07:41.520
You know, I was on staff, especially as a retired police officer,

00:07:41.600 --> 00:07:44.020
and I wasn't retired at the time I was serving in the ministry,

00:07:44.320 --> 00:07:47.580
people let their kids all run around the church like it's a playground.

00:07:48.160 --> 00:07:50.140
No, they need to walk.

00:07:50.740 --> 00:07:53.520
This is not a playground. This is holy ground.

00:07:54.180 --> 00:07:59.260
Yeah, let's get that together. Then the parents want to roll their eyes at you

00:07:59.260 --> 00:08:00.440
like you did something wrong.

00:08:00.640 --> 00:08:02.920
No, you take your child outside.

00:08:03.560 --> 00:08:08.660
Then you go to their house. You got to take off your shoes and you got to do all this stuff.

00:08:09.320 --> 00:08:14.560
But when you're at the church, your child is what? They can't run around their own house now.

00:08:14.900 --> 00:08:19.320
I mean, talk to me about that. So you have to, you must, you must discipline

00:08:19.320 --> 00:08:21.820
your own children. So let's talk about it.

00:08:22.420 --> 00:08:26.740
So let's make it plain. Parents who go to church but ignore rebellion at home.

00:08:26.840 --> 00:08:27.840
I was just about to go there.

00:08:28.300 --> 00:08:32.380
Pastors who preach truth but refuse to correct their inner circle.

00:08:33.140 --> 00:08:37.380
Leaders who protect titles more than they protect truth.

00:08:37.760 --> 00:08:42.880
Christians who sin, see sin, but say, it's not my place to judge.

00:08:43.682 --> 00:08:48.162
Christians who see sin, but it's not my place to judge. We're not called to

00:08:48.162 --> 00:08:51.042
be harsh, but we're called to be holy.

00:08:52.122 --> 00:08:58.782
Eli's failure wasn't in loving his son. It was letting love override obedience.

00:08:59.522 --> 00:09:03.862
Many times when we love our son, we have to be able, our sons,

00:09:04.022 --> 00:09:10.662
our daughters, we have to be able to be honest and truthful and maybe discipline

00:09:10.662 --> 00:09:13.782
them. not maybe, we must discipline them.

00:09:13.942 --> 00:09:18.302
Because that's our job as parents, to say that's not right.

00:09:18.922 --> 00:09:23.302
And if they do it again, they are out of there. So they don't get to be part

00:09:23.302 --> 00:09:28.362
of the legacy of the church because you are acting a fool.

00:09:28.562 --> 00:09:32.282
And most of the time, as you know, church kids, because we spend so much time

00:09:32.282 --> 00:09:35.722
at the church, they don't get a chance to honor the church. Why?

00:09:35.982 --> 00:09:39.382
Because it grows so familiar to them.

00:09:40.042 --> 00:09:45.662
Unless you're teaching them that at home, that church atmosphere is so familiar.

00:09:45.762 --> 00:09:47.682
They don't grow up in the church.

00:09:47.922 --> 00:09:51.342
I mean, you want to understand that God's presence is there,

00:09:51.862 --> 00:09:55.342
right? You want them to grow up honoring the church. Let's just keep going.

00:09:55.982 --> 00:10:00.242
Four ways to break the curse of passive leadership. Eli was just passive.

00:10:00.882 --> 00:10:07.502
He loves his son so much, but he didn't love him as much as he loved him more than he loved the Lord.

00:10:08.002 --> 00:10:10.622
And I think that can be a problem too.

00:10:11.442 --> 00:10:14.262
And you know, let's just take a pause here. I'm thinking.

00:10:15.142 --> 00:10:18.542
We all have, I don't know if everybody has children that's listening to this

00:10:18.542 --> 00:10:23.802
podcast, but if you ask the Lord, Lord, my kids are acting up,

00:10:24.022 --> 00:10:26.962
what can I do? What do you want me to do? What's the plan?

00:10:27.462 --> 00:10:31.722
He will tell you, this is what I want you to do. Remember, he's in the room.

00:10:32.402 --> 00:10:37.102
Remove them from that position for a season, and I'll take care of it.

00:10:37.802 --> 00:10:43.342
And so that means that you would put him first. I mean, it might get ugly.

00:10:43.602 --> 00:10:48.162
It might just get a little nasty, and they're going to be mad at you.

00:10:48.602 --> 00:10:54.942
But I guarantee you that once they understand that God deserves to be honored,

00:10:55.602 --> 00:10:57.882
That's a lesson they will never, ever forget.

00:10:58.182 --> 00:11:03.722
Because if they're called to the ministry and you set them down early and you

00:11:03.722 --> 00:11:08.382
allow God to minister to them and to get their hearts right,

00:11:08.682 --> 00:11:14.582
oh my gosh, they will be long-term ministers forever. Why?

00:11:14.782 --> 00:11:17.462
Because they were corrected at the right time.

00:11:18.584 --> 00:11:22.844
And they will correct their children. And their children will correct their children.

00:11:23.304 --> 00:11:28.604
And you won't have this Eli passive leadership because you stood up.

00:11:29.844 --> 00:11:34.624
And a lot of times we're so afraid of our children being angry with us. We are the parents.

00:11:35.004 --> 00:11:37.864
They can be angry, but don't sin.

00:11:38.104 --> 00:11:43.324
I mean, if you don't like it, you can leave the church. And when you grow up, you can come back.

00:11:44.124 --> 00:11:49.064
You know, I guarantee you that they will learn. God, give them to Jesus.

00:11:50.104 --> 00:11:53.964
They, Jesus can handle it. Give them to Jesus.

00:11:54.264 --> 00:12:00.444
Don't let it cost you your life because you refuse to honor his presence.

00:12:01.244 --> 00:12:05.124
I got a little emotional there because that's so serious. Let's go.

00:12:05.644 --> 00:12:08.984
How do you break this passive leadership?

00:12:09.824 --> 00:12:12.684
Number one, call it out. Don't cover it up.

00:12:13.324 --> 00:12:15.584
Ephesians 5.11 tells us, have

00:12:15.584 --> 00:12:20.824
nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose it.

00:12:21.464 --> 00:12:24.944
Love speaks truth even when it's uncomfortable.

00:12:25.944 --> 00:12:29.064
Number two, choose obedience over opinion.

00:12:30.384 --> 00:12:35.724
Am I now trying to win approval of human beings or of God?

00:12:35.884 --> 00:12:41.944
Galatians 1.10 says, do you want to be, come on now here. Am I trying to win

00:12:41.944 --> 00:12:46.184
approval of humans or of God?

00:12:47.004 --> 00:12:53.124
Galatians 1.10, you have to decide. You're going to have to trust God with this one.

00:12:53.644 --> 00:12:58.444
That's going to be a hard decision, especially if you are the father and you

00:12:58.444 --> 00:13:00.584
know your sons are going to carry your legacy.

00:13:00.684 --> 00:13:06.644
They can't carry a legacy doing stuff like that at the church. They need to sit down.

00:13:07.644 --> 00:13:11.864
Number three, protect the house of God like it's holy because it is.

00:13:12.244 --> 00:13:19.784
John 2.17 says, zeal for your house has consumed me. It's not just about church attendance.

00:13:20.124 --> 00:13:22.384
It's about sacred stewardship.

00:13:22.964 --> 00:13:24.064
It is holy.

00:13:24.864 --> 00:13:31.584
Remember, God is in the room. Lead with fear and fire, not familiarity.

00:13:33.006 --> 00:13:38.666
The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom, Proverbs 9.10.

00:13:39.206 --> 00:13:45.066
So think about this. The conviction of the sons of Eli had grown cold.

00:13:45.566 --> 00:13:49.046
Eli loved the kids so much that he refused to discipline.

00:13:49.526 --> 00:13:54.246
We can think of that even if it's not in the church. How many adult children

00:13:54.246 --> 00:14:01.366
or even children that the parents love them so much that they refuse to discipline them.

00:14:01.366 --> 00:14:05.846
And then they end up, you know, dead.

00:14:07.246 --> 00:14:10.026
You know, you know, not a good thing.

00:14:10.426 --> 00:14:15.486
And then let's go back over those real quick. How do we curse passive leadership?

00:14:15.806 --> 00:14:20.266
We call it out, don't cover it up. We choose obedience over opinion.

00:14:20.906 --> 00:14:25.186
We choose obedience to God over opinion of people.

00:14:25.546 --> 00:14:31.066
And then protect the house of God like it's holy because it is. And lead with fear.

00:14:31.366 --> 00:14:33.766
And fire, not familiarity.

00:14:34.466 --> 00:14:38.866
Eli sat in the house of God and still missed the voice of God.

00:14:39.226 --> 00:14:47.606
His familiarity dulled his discernment, and because he tolerated sin, he forfeited legacy.

00:14:48.046 --> 00:14:55.686
He also forfeited his life, his son's life. So let this be a warning in 2025.

00:14:56.326 --> 00:15:02.286
Don't let love become a license for compromise. Don't let fear of confrontation

00:15:02.286 --> 00:15:09.806
rob you of obedience, and don't let your silence cost someone else their salvation.

00:15:11.032 --> 00:15:14.512
Don't let the love become a license for compromise.

00:15:14.992 --> 00:15:18.712
Don't let fear of confrontation rob you of obedience.

00:15:19.092 --> 00:15:25.592
And don't let the silence cost someone else their salvation. Let's pray.

00:15:26.152 --> 00:15:31.032
Lord, I repent of the times I stay silent when you call me to speak.

00:15:31.352 --> 00:15:35.592
Forgive me for tolerating what you told me to confront.

00:15:36.172 --> 00:15:38.812
Restore holy reverence in my life.

00:15:39.472 --> 00:15:44.852
Help me lead with courage and not comfort. Make me a protector of your presence,

00:15:45.112 --> 00:15:47.192
not a passive bystander.

00:15:47.412 --> 00:15:49.532
In Jesus' name, amen.

00:15:50.712 --> 00:15:53.532
This has been Faith on the Go with your host, Connie Morris.

00:15:53.732 --> 00:15:59.692
And remember, familiarity will make you passive, but fear of the Lord will make you powerful.

00:16:00.072 --> 00:16:05.652
Be bold, be obedient, and don't let what's sacred become routine.

00:16:05.652 --> 00:16:10.172
Be sure to subscribe, leave a review, and share this with someone who has been

00:16:10.172 --> 00:16:11.892
avoiding a hard conversation.

00:16:12.312 --> 00:16:21.812
You can connect with me on the Diary of Black Women podcast on Instagram or X and visit my website,

00:16:22.012 --> 00:16:26.472
DiaryOfBlackWomen at LLC.com for more devotionals, teaching,

00:16:26.612 --> 00:16:29.672
and tools to keep you, keep your walk real.

00:16:29.672 --> 00:16:36.532
Until next time, stay sharp, stay surrendered, keep walking with faith on the go.