The Danger of Bargaining with God: A Lesson from Jonah

0:00 Welcome back. Welcome back to the Diary of a Black Woman podcast. I'm your host Connie Morris and I am so grateful you're here as we continue our series, The Games We Play With God. Today's episode is called Negotiating with God. Have you ever found yourself trying to bargain with God? Maybe you said something like, Lord, if you just do this one thing, I promise I'll never do that again. It's a game we all play at some point. But the truth is that negotiating with God shows a lack of trust in his wisdom and plan.

0:46 So today we're going to dive into the story of Jonah. You all, we all know Jonah, right? And so who tried, Jonah is the one who tried to run from God's call and later negotiated from a place of anger and pride. If you ever resisted God's will or tried to strike a deal with him, this episode is for you. I, you know, sometimes we find ourselves in a place of Jonah. So you have to read the book of Jonah to get the full scoop. God told, he wanted Jonah to go to Nineveh.

1:29 I can't think of it. I can't say it right. But Nineveh, go to Nineveh. So, and then he went the other way. Jonah ran the other way. How many of us have done that? And then God knows the other way you're going, so he interrupts your flow. So let's go to Jonah 1, verses 1 to 3, and let's see how Jonah tries to bargain with God. It starts out with, The word of the Lord came to Jonah, the son of Amatea. Go to the city of Nineveh and preach against it, because its wickedness has come up before me. But Jonah ran away from the Lord and headed for Tarshish.

2:14 So we see here that God gave Jonah, which was a prophet, a word for Nineveh to go and preach against his wickedness because God had plans to save Nineveh, the people there. But no, Jonah had his own plan and he went the opposite way. So instead of obeying God, Jonah ran in the opposite direction. Later in the story, after reluctantly delivering God's message to Nineveh, Jonah tried to bargain with God, expressing anger when God showed mercy to the Ninevites. So if you read the whole story of Jonah, God showed great mercy to the Ninevites.

3:00 They end up fasting and praying, and God did not destroy the land like he had said, prophesied through Jonah, and Jonah at the end of the story was upset that God had a heart to save. That God's story, the story didn't end as he thought it was. How many of us has that? We don't have the heart of God. We want our enemies to perish and burn up, but God decides to save them and send them to your church. Come on now, send them to your church, and then they end up getting ordained and preaching the word to you. Am I speaking to someone out there? Hello, that God has called them to your church to serve in your ministry, right?

3:50 And so Jonah negotiation wasn't about obedience or faith. It was about trying to manipulate God to fit in his preference. We have a way that we want God to serve justice on our enemies, but God has another way he wants to serve grace on our enemies. And so negotiating with God often reveals our reluctance to trust his plan over our own desires. Have you ever resisted God's will because it didn't align with your preferences? We all have. It's a good chance to just say, God, your will, your will is best.

4:35 I'd rather not go that way, but I'm going to go that way because you said so. We see here that negotiating with God often stems from fear, pride, or misunderstanding of his character. We think we can trade something to get what we want, but God doesn't need our deals. He wants our trust. God says in Isaiah 55, 8-9, it says, For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.

5:20 So God's thoughts are higher than our, his ways are higher, his thoughts are higher. So he's way ahead of the game. So when we negotiate, we limit our faith to what we can see or understand. But God's plan, God's plan are always better. I like to say they're bigger than ours, even when they don't make sense at the time. So good. Are you trying to convince God to, God, are you trying to convince, are you trying to convince God instead of trusting in his plan? And are you trying to get him to go your way instead of just following his way?

6:03 We already read here in Isaiah 55, 8 through 9, that his thoughts are not our thoughts. Neither are our ways his ways, right, declares the Lord. And so we want our thoughts to be what God wants. We want our ways to be his ways. So what are some dangers when we try to negotiate with God? Number one, when we try to bargain with him, it undermines trust. You ever have your children do that? Even your best friend. You know, if you do this, I'll do that. And you know the deal is not equal. And you're just laughing like, dude, you're trying to rip me off.

6:46 You know that's not equal. Or, you know, dude or mom or you tell your kids, you know, however that language goes. But it undermines trust. Negotiating often reveals a lack of faith in God's wisdom and timing. So we undermine God's trust when we try to negotiate with God. Number two, it delays obedience. Jonah's refusal to obey God immediately caused a storm that endangered others and delayed God's mission. So God had to call the big fish to get Jonah. I mean, first of all, Jonah went the other way.

7:31 So we had to get Jonah to turn around, get the fish, get the people. It was just a lot of unnecessary events to get Jonah to do what God had told him to do originally. We know what that means, right? When we disobey what God has called us to do, If you really think about the time that's wasted, it's pretty much delayed obedience. And we know that delayed obedience is really disobedience. So we're not negotiating with God. We go back to disobeying God. Amen. And number three, it puts us in the driver's seat. When we negotiate, we essentially say that we know better than God, which is a dangerous place to be.

8:18 And so what are the dangers of negotiating with God? Number one, it undermines trust. Negotiating, it just shows you lack faith or I lack faith. It undermines trust. Number two, it delays obedience, which puts you in that disobedience pile. And we talked about that in one of our episodes. You don't want to be disobedient towards God. And number three, it puts us in a driver's seat. It makes you God. It makes you the God of your life. And if you don't have a heaven and hell to put yourself in, you're kind of out of your zone. So you might want to step back. It's a dangerous place to be.

9:02 Proverbs 3, 5 to 6 says, Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not to your own understanding. In all your ways, submit to him and he will make your path straight. So it's always so quick to just turn around and say, oops, I was trying to be God. I'm sorry. I'm not. And so I'm going to get out of the driver's seat and... Get out of my disobedience cycle, and allow you, Lord, to just be God in my life. How do you stop this negotiating with God? Number one, you want to, and if it's a habit, you want to kind of break that habit. A lot of times, you know, we might get away with, well, God, if you do this, I'll do this. And then God, somehow he does it.

9:49 And then it becomes a way that you have this communication with him. And in reality, it's not a good way to have a community. It's not a good way to always be with God. Lord, if you save me from this and I'll do that. And somehow it happens, right? He's just like, okay, my daughter, my son, okay, I'll do that one thing. And then you make that your habit to keep doing it. And so when I mention it for the first one, you want to break that habit. So how do we stop negotiating and start trusting? How do we break that habit of negotiating with God? A lot of times, just like kids, when we get away with it once, we keep doing it over and over again.

10:32 Number one, you want to make it a habit to just surrender fully. Instead of bargaining with God, surrender your plans to God's will. Luke 22, 42 says it best. It says, Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me. Yet, not my reward, but yours be done. That was Jesus and the God in the Gethsemane. He was like, okay, this is going to be hard. But he asked the Father, if you're willing, take this cup from me. But if you're not, then let your will be done. That's the way you become fully surrendered. God, if you can do it, do it.

11:13 If you don't, then hey, then your will be done in this situation. Number two, seek God's perspective. And so that's a powerful one. I like this one because when you spend time in prayer and scripture to align your desires, your desires with God's will. It's similar to say like, you know, the more you get to know God's heart, the more it's easier for you to see his perspective and the direction he wants you to go. You may not like it, but you can better understand it as you understand. OK, I got to do that to get to there. He might not tell you a whole story, but at least you got the first two steps.

11:57 Right. And then if you are connecting with them all the way, you might be able to skip some steps, but you're walking in obedience. You walk in and fully surrender. And then he's guiding you all the way. Psalms 37, 4 says, delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart. But, you know, there's a lot of times when you, not a lot of times, but many times as you read the Bible, you see in the book of Genesis, the Israelites, they spent 40 years in the wilderness. Why did they spend so long going around the same, I call it mulberry tree, right? Because they did not want to listen to God. They wanted to do their own thing, their own way.

12:43 And we knew that one generation died that never got the chance to see the promises of God. Why? Because they kept wanting to do their own way. And God is patient with that. He says, this generation is going to die, and then the next generation is going to grow up. And so we know the Joshua generation grew up, and they were able to see the promised land and cross over and saw the Red Sea open, saw a lot of miracles and signs and wonders, saw God at his best. It's always at his best, but he's always at his best, but saw things that their parents did not see. So we want to be able to see God's perspective.

13:26 And how do we do that? Get to know him by spending time in prayer and reading his word. Number three, you want to take the first step in obedience. We talked about delayed obedience is disobedience. So you take that first step. Even if you don't understand the whole picture, trust God enough to take that first step. You're negotiating with him. Jonah went the opposite way. What could he have done differently? He could have said, okay, Lord, I really don't want to go to Nineveh. So tell me, what's the story in Nineveh? Why do you like these people so much?

14:09 And maybe he will, maybe he won't. But at the point, you didn't just spend your whole day running the opposite way. And God spent his whole time getting you to go the right way. Because at the end of the day, you're going to go God's direction, period. So you go the long way or you can go the short way. He's called Jonah for that specific assignment. But did you notice that after Jonah did that specific assignment, God could no longer use him for anything else. His story ended in Jonah. That was his book. That was his story. That was his assignment, the end, right?

14:49 You know do you want your story Just to be one chapter one verse Do you want God to continue To use you. I know, take a pause and think about that. Ah, that kind of sat with me too. How do you break free from the habit of negotiating with God? You surrender to Him fully, you seek God's perspective, and you take the first step of obedience. Decree is to trust God fully. Let's just do some quick decrees here. This is a hearty one because many times if you are the one that always want to negotiate with God, it puts you in a place where you just need to begin to trust God.

15:37 What happens if you just say, okay, take step number three. Okay, I'm just going to do it this time. I'm not going to ask any questions. Some of us got that, why, Lord? Why do we got to do it this way? Why do we got to do it that way? We're still wasting time. We're still wasting time. God's trying to get you to do ABC and you're still up there. Let me pray a little more. Let me do this a little bit more. And you're just still wasting time. So let's get our trust in God and let's just do what he asks. Ready? Let's decree this and then let's take the first step of obedience. Number one, I decree that I trust God's plans and will obey his call without hesitation.

16:22 I say that again. I decree that I trust God's plans and will obey his call without hesitation. I decree that I will not lean on my own understanding, but will seek God's wisdom in all things. The key here, that I will seek God's wisdom in all things. So he's not asking you to take a blind step. He's asking you to, oh, can you talk to me about this? Get in the habit of a habit of meeting with God every day and then these sudden moves won't seem so sudden, I remember a time I was just talking with God he said my moves are not sudden remember the story of.

17:09 Of Abraham with the ram in the bush, the ram in the thicket. Remember, the ram was already in the thicket. He was just waiting for Abraham to get to that set point, to do that set thing, and it was ready for him. How many of us are, God is waiting for us to get to that set point, to do that set obedience move so that we can receive that set award from God? Right? Because we have to seek his way, seek his wisdom. It says, I decree, repeat after me, I decree that God's timing and ways are perfect. And I surrender fully to his will.

17:53 However you say it, when you say it, just go, just move. When you're new at it, it takes a little bit. But after a while, you begin to trust his voice. You'll be like, okay, do it now. Quit now, resign now, write the paper now, do this now, hand it in now, right now, Lord. Yes, right now. Do it now. Oh, wow. And then things just start to roll. And sometimes you'll sit and you're just being amazed how God works. He's like, I just need you to move your ram in the bushes over here. I just need you to get to that spot so that you can receive your reward.

18:34 Amen. And so what I want you to do this week is I want you to reflect on areas where you have been negotiating with God. I want you to ask yourself, am I delaying obedience because I don't trust God's plan? How can I surrender my desire to align with his will? And I want you also to remember that delayed obedience is disobedience. I want you to also, with this practical challenge, I want you to write down one area where you've been trying to bargain with God. A lot of times there's a silence.

19:15 You know, a lot of times, I keep saying a lot of times, but I don't know a lot of times because I don't know what you do in your times. But I can say in my life that I never really try to bargain. I just don't do it. I'd be like, I'll just wait and see if that thing passes, right? Is that you too? So write down one area where you've been trying to bargain with God or pretty much ignoring it, hoping it just go away. So just pray over what he's asked you to do and asking him to help you trust his will and take the next step of obedience.

19:56 Just do it. It's similar to, you ever went to like a pool party? And you coming over there, you all cute with your hair down and everything. And you don't plan on getting wet. You're trying. You're not even trying to get near the pool. But you had a pool party. Why did you come to the pool party, right? And somehow, someway, somebody has pushed you in the pool. But now you're wet. You're like, I'm wet? And so now they can't even pull you out the pool. Is that being you? And that's pretty much how it is when you walk with God. Once you take that first plunge in faith, there's no way ever, ever can you not get wet with God again.

20:45 Because you know that you came to the pool party. You came to God in faith. Why not continue in faith? All this tiptoeing around it, putting on the act like you're walking in faith and not doing nothing but just walking in disobedience, negotiating on the sidelines with them. Remember, when you went to the pool party, if you ever went to a pool party, beautiful pool, they got the hors d'oeuvres and everything. You're not even dressed to get wet, but yet they put you in the pool. They might push you in the pool, thought it was funny, But then by the end of the day, you are just, I'm not getting out the pool. You're just enjoying the pool.

21:26 You can't be upset because once your hair is wet, you're wet. It's just going to have some fun. And that's what I'm trying to say with you. Take the first plunge and then enjoy your time with God in this faith walk. Why not? Right? So let's close this out with prayer. Heavenly Father, thank you for your patience with us. even when we resist or try to bargain with you, help us to take the first plunge. Help us to trust your plans and surrender fully to your will. Teach us to walk in obedience, knowing that your ways are higher and better than ours. Strengthen our faith as we follow you wholeheartedly. In Jesus' name.

22:12 Alrighty, thank you for joining me, your host Connie Morris, for this episode of the games we play with God. If today's message encourages you, share it with friend or foe, hello, and subscribe so you don't miss the next episode, where we'll be discussing game number eight, misusing God's grace. Until next time, I'll say take the faith plunge, stay trusting, stay obedient, and be blessed.