The Lioness and the Ladies: Ep. 7: Embracing Your True Self in Christ

WEBVTT

00:00:10.607 --> 00:00:13.767
Family, thank you for spending time with me today.

00:00:14.047 --> 00:00:17.747
To every woman listening who has ever felt hidden, overlooked,

00:00:17.807 --> 00:00:20.167
or pushed aside, hear me clearly.

00:00:20.447 --> 00:00:24.987
God has not forgotten you, and neither have I.

00:00:25.227 --> 00:00:30.227
Now let's go before the Lord and close this out with a word from God,

00:00:30.407 --> 00:00:34.947
because someone out there needs this reminder today.

00:00:35.307 --> 00:00:42.007
Jeremiah 29, 11, verses 11 through 14. For I know the plans I have for you,

00:00:42.167 --> 00:00:45.787
declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you,

00:00:46.147 --> 00:00:48.447
plans to give you hope and a future.

00:00:48.727 --> 00:00:53.547
Then when you call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you,

00:00:53.807 --> 00:00:59.007
you will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

00:00:59.147 --> 00:01:05.087
I will be found by you, declares the Lord, and bring you back from captivity.

00:01:05.527 --> 00:01:11.467
Father God, we thank you for your word, that it is true, that it is living, that it is for us.

00:01:11.667 --> 00:01:16.787
You said you know the plans you have for us, plans to prosper us and not to

00:01:16.787 --> 00:01:19.587
harm us, plans to give us hope and a future.

00:01:19.847 --> 00:01:24.207
So today we receive that, not just in our minds, but in our hearts.

00:01:24.347 --> 00:01:28.187
When we feel overlooked, remind us you still see us.

00:01:28.347 --> 00:01:33.647
When we feel forgotten, remind us you still have a plan. And when we feel hidden,

00:01:33.907 --> 00:01:36.147
remind us you are still working.

00:01:36.587 --> 00:01:42.187
Your word says that when we call on you, you will listen. So we call on you now. Hear us.

00:01:42.507 --> 00:01:46.627
Strengthen us. Guide us. Help us to seek you with our whole heart,

00:01:46.827 --> 00:01:49.867
not halfway, not sometimes, but fully.

00:01:50.087 --> 00:01:54.487
And as we seek you, let us find you in every season, in every place.

00:01:55.042 --> 00:02:00.302
Even the hidden one. Restore what was lost, renew what feels broken,

00:02:00.522 --> 00:02:05.082
and remind us that nothing in our lives is wasted in your hand.

00:02:05.322 --> 00:02:11.442
Lord, we trust you, we believe you, and we stand on your word. In Jesus' name, amen.

00:02:12.002 --> 00:02:15.982
This is Diary of a Black Woman podcast, and I'm your host, Connie Morris,

00:02:16.162 --> 00:02:18.922
and I'll see you on the next episode.

00:02:32.127 --> 00:02:36.227
Hello, and welcome back to Diary of a Black Woman podcast. I'm your host,

00:02:36.307 --> 00:02:41.447
Connie Morris, and we're continuing our series, The Lioness and the Ladies.

00:02:41.687 --> 00:02:47.807
We're on day seven, episode seven. The Lioness reflects the lion. Identity matters.

00:02:48.207 --> 00:02:55.207
Our spiritual focus is on the identity in Christ. I want to read from my King

00:02:55.207 --> 00:02:58.447
James Version, you know, our foundational scriptures.

00:02:58.787 --> 00:03:03.947
And it's been powerful for me because every time I read it, I grab something out of it.

00:03:04.047 --> 00:03:09.387
We are all considered virtuous women, but we all can continue to grow.

00:03:09.607 --> 00:03:15.167
And one of the ways that we grow is we set our foundation and our identity in

00:03:15.167 --> 00:03:18.687
Christ. And we're going to go through a lot of good scriptures on that today.

00:03:19.227 --> 00:03:23.127
Hopefully by the end of this episode, you will understand a couple of things.

00:03:23.247 --> 00:03:27.207
You're not here alone and that you don't have to compare yourself to others

00:03:27.207 --> 00:03:29.547
because God created you different.

00:03:29.927 --> 00:03:33.267
You're beautifully and wonderfully made as you are.

00:03:33.487 --> 00:03:38.467
We spend our whole life trying to find a style or copy someone else's style

00:03:38.467 --> 00:03:43.107
when God's already created a style within us. And so let's go.

00:03:43.987 --> 00:03:48.527
31 verse 10. This one's coming out of King James Version. It says,

00:03:48.647 --> 00:03:52.827
who can find a virtuous woman for her price is far above rubies?

00:03:52.987 --> 00:03:58.247
I mean, if you really realize that you are valuable and that your price,

00:03:58.467 --> 00:04:01.507
your identity, who you are as a virtuous woman.

00:04:02.029 --> 00:04:05.809
Is priceless, then I think that we won't sell ourselves short.

00:04:05.969 --> 00:04:09.729
We will always expect the best in every situation.

00:04:10.069 --> 00:04:15.929
Verse 11, the heart of her husband does safely trust in her so that he should have no need of spoil.

00:04:16.089 --> 00:04:19.409
If he has it, you have it, right? So that's a good scripture.

00:04:19.689 --> 00:04:24.409
12, she will do him good and not evil all the days of her life.

00:04:24.449 --> 00:04:29.489
She seeks wool, flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.

00:04:29.669 --> 00:04:33.489
She is like the merchant ships who brings food from afar.

00:04:33.749 --> 00:04:41.269
She rises up while it is yet night and giveth meat to her household and a portion her maidens.

00:04:41.389 --> 00:04:44.289
She is considered a field and buyeth it.

00:04:44.449 --> 00:04:48.889
With the fruit of her hands, she planted a vineyard. She girdeth her loins with

00:04:48.889 --> 00:04:50.809
strength and strengthens her arms.

00:04:50.949 --> 00:04:53.509
She perceives that her merchandise is good.

00:04:53.749 --> 00:04:58.729
Her candle goeth out by night. She lays her hands to the spindle,

00:04:58.829 --> 00:05:01.769
and her hands hold the distaff. Come on.

00:05:02.149 --> 00:05:07.769
She stretches out her hand to the poor. Yea, she reaches forth her hands to

00:05:07.769 --> 00:05:10.129
the needy. That means she's not greedy.

00:05:10.389 --> 00:05:15.149
21, she is not afraid of the snow for her household, for all of her household

00:05:15.149 --> 00:05:16.329
are clothed with scarlet.

00:05:16.449 --> 00:05:19.049
She maketh herself coverings of tapestry.

00:05:19.369 --> 00:05:25.009
Her clothing is silk and purple. Her husband is known in the gates when he sitteth

00:05:25.009 --> 00:05:26.789
among the elders of the land.

00:05:26.929 --> 00:05:32.049
She maketh fine linen and sells it, and delivers girdles unto the merchants.

00:05:32.469 --> 00:05:37.209
Strength and honor are her clothing, and she shall rejoice in the time to come.

00:05:37.349 --> 00:05:42.049
She opens her mouth with wisdom, and her tongue is the law of kindness.

00:05:42.309 --> 00:05:47.129
She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not of the bread of idleness.

00:05:47.652 --> 00:05:52.812
Her children arise and call her blessed, her husband also, and he praises her.

00:05:53.072 --> 00:05:58.812
Many daughters have done versely, but thou excels in them all.

00:05:58.952 --> 00:06:01.432
I love that it ends, let's go to verse 30.

00:06:01.852 --> 00:06:06.132
Her favor is deceitful, favor is deceitful, and beauty is vain.

00:06:06.352 --> 00:06:11.212
But a woman that fears the Lord, she shall be praised.

00:06:11.272 --> 00:06:16.892
We see here the Proverbs woman identity is not in all that she does.

00:06:16.892 --> 00:06:21.152
Not all that she sells, not who buys her stuff, her merchandise,

00:06:21.532 --> 00:06:26.092
but her favor and her beauty comes from fearing the Lord.

00:06:26.352 --> 00:06:30.252
I love it. It says favor is deceitful and beauty is vain.

00:06:30.692 --> 00:06:36.232
Those things change over time, but not those who are rooted and founded in Christ.

00:06:36.432 --> 00:06:40.012
You just grow more and more. You prosper more and more.

00:06:40.152 --> 00:06:44.732
There are moments when identity becomes unclear, not all at once,

00:06:44.892 --> 00:06:49.852
but slowly through pressure, expectations, comparison, and the weight of life.

00:06:49.952 --> 00:06:55.352
It's easy to begin moving without remembering who you are, to respond without

00:06:55.352 --> 00:06:59.952
recognizing what you carry, and to live in ways that reflect what surrounds

00:06:59.952 --> 00:07:02.952
you rather than what God has spoken.

00:07:03.132 --> 00:07:09.912
As I was reading through the Proverbs 31 women, it comes to mind some incidents as a retired officer.

00:07:09.912 --> 00:07:16.192
When I saw women do some different things, selling their bodies, selling drugs,

00:07:16.612 --> 00:07:22.512
taking drugs into facilities like the jail or the prison for the man on the

00:07:22.512 --> 00:07:28.672
other side, their identity was lost or it was based on what they did.

00:07:28.872 --> 00:07:32.592
And I'm just here to tell you that our identity should be in Christ.

00:07:33.015 --> 00:07:38.055
He's done it all for us, you know? So our identity should not be in something

00:07:38.055 --> 00:07:41.335
that is created, like something that's subject to change.

00:07:41.455 --> 00:07:45.075
The Bible tells us always to walk by faith and not by sight.

00:07:45.195 --> 00:07:48.075
And the things that you see with your eyes are subject to change.

00:07:48.255 --> 00:07:52.215
You can look in a mirror one day at yourself and you're looking gorgeous and

00:07:52.215 --> 00:07:57.155
wonderful, but yet your mouth is speaking communication and your behavior and

00:07:57.155 --> 00:07:59.895
your attitude, it starts to wear on you.

00:08:00.155 --> 00:08:05.395
Your beauty becomes faded. It becomes dark because you're not representing Christ anymore.

00:08:05.535 --> 00:08:07.075
You're representing the world.

00:08:07.215 --> 00:08:10.695
The Bible says, don't be conformed to this world, but be transformed.

00:08:11.135 --> 00:08:14.775
So God doesn't want us to be a product of society.

00:08:14.995 --> 00:08:19.315
He created us in his own image, says Genesis 1, 27.

00:08:19.815 --> 00:08:24.335
It says, from the beginning of time, there was an intention for you.

00:08:24.535 --> 00:08:26.415
There was an intention for me. This

00:08:26.415 --> 00:08:32.035
was all by design, an identity that established that only God shapes it.

00:08:32.275 --> 00:08:37.715
Something that we have control, but we have a God who's in control. Amen.

00:08:38.055 --> 00:08:41.935
And Bible tells us too that, I love the scriptures, 1 Peter 2.9.

00:08:42.175 --> 00:08:44.955
I'm going to find it. I want to read it in its entirety.

00:08:45.195 --> 00:08:47.695
1 Peter 2.9.

00:08:47.995 --> 00:08:52.015
And when you read this, you should just sit up straight and say, yep, that's me.

00:08:52.175 --> 00:08:56.915
And I'm going to stop acting like somebody else. I'm going to start acting like

00:08:56.915 --> 00:08:58.475
what God has created me to be.

00:08:58.775 --> 00:09:02.595
That's in 1 Peter. I put it in 2 Peter. 1 Peter 2.9.

00:09:03.749 --> 00:09:07.809
Tells us this, but ye are a chosen generation,

00:09:08.189 --> 00:09:14.869
a royal priesthood and holy nation, a peculiar people that ye should show forth

00:09:14.869 --> 00:09:21.989
the praises of him who has called you out of darkness into his marvelous light.

00:09:22.209 --> 00:09:24.049
Our identity is not random.

00:09:24.289 --> 00:09:29.389
It wasn't by accident. It defines who we belong to.

00:09:29.389 --> 00:09:35.129
Let's keep going on about the identity because I think it really requires a

00:09:35.129 --> 00:09:38.849
little bit more weight because of what I see in the world,

00:09:39.009 --> 00:09:42.809
what I've experienced in my own self and how I want to change too.

00:09:42.889 --> 00:09:44.969
I want to change to the virtuous woman.

00:09:45.069 --> 00:09:48.389
Now, remember I told you, it comes through the preacher first.

00:09:48.549 --> 00:09:52.529
And so that means God has been working on my heart about changing some of my

00:09:52.529 --> 00:09:54.329
behavior that doesn't reflect him.

00:09:54.429 --> 00:09:58.709
We don't know what that behavior is until we're pressed and we're squeezed.

00:09:58.709 --> 00:10:02.409
And out of it doesn't come Jesus, it comes the world.

00:10:02.649 --> 00:10:09.209
And God wants it when he squeezes us, that out comes him, not the world's language,

00:10:09.529 --> 00:10:12.489
not the world's ways, not the world's attitude.

00:10:12.829 --> 00:10:16.689
So how do we define identity? Identity is deeper than appearance,

00:10:17.029 --> 00:10:23.729
status, success, race, title, money, relationship, or what people think about you.

00:10:24.069 --> 00:10:29.109
True identity reaches far beyond the natural eye can see. Our identity is embedded

00:10:29.109 --> 00:10:30.949
within the inner person.

00:10:31.409 --> 00:10:36.649
I mean, when we were born, Psalms 139 tells us that he formed us in our womb.

00:10:36.729 --> 00:10:42.229
And as he was forming us, he put, boom, in the middle, his identity in our inner

00:10:42.229 --> 00:10:46.749
man. It's woven in our mind, in our spirit, in our heart.

00:10:47.275 --> 00:10:53.075
Purpose, our character, our values, and calling of what God's called you to do.

00:10:53.195 --> 00:10:57.455
It shapes how you think, how you speak, how you respond to life.

00:10:57.555 --> 00:11:01.095
I like to say how when life presses you, when life squeezes you,

00:11:01.195 --> 00:11:04.495
and how you see yourself when no one else is watching.

00:11:04.755 --> 00:11:10.055
Long before people place labels on us, God already knew who we were.

00:11:10.195 --> 00:11:15.815
The problem is that many people lose their identity through comparison. How do we do that?

00:11:16.115 --> 00:11:21.595
Comparison, we start to question our worth. Maybe we're at an age that we think

00:11:21.595 --> 00:11:25.635
we should be doing something different, but we compare ourselves to somebody else

00:11:25.975 --> 00:11:30.055
who is younger and doing it all. We start to question our worth.

00:11:30.235 --> 00:11:32.315
We start to reject our uniqueness.

00:11:32.635 --> 00:11:36.335
And I remember, we all have this. I remember as a young child,

00:11:36.515 --> 00:11:41.155
I always wanted to have different shapes of body parts, right? You know how we are.

00:11:41.295 --> 00:11:48.855
I wanted to be super skinny and maybe short, something that my life doesn't reflect.

00:11:48.975 --> 00:11:56.555
Because my mom is 5'10", my dad is 6'3", I'm 5'10". So there's no way I'm going to be 5'3 out of this.

00:11:56.715 --> 00:11:59.155
There's no way I'm going to be skinny. My mom is built strong.

00:11:59.375 --> 00:12:02.395
My dad is built strong. So guess what? I'm going to be built strong.

00:12:02.575 --> 00:12:07.255
And so my uniqueness came from comparing. I wanted to be someone else.

00:12:07.355 --> 00:12:11.295
I wanted to be super skinny. So I'll go on these extreme weight loss regimen,

00:12:11.435 --> 00:12:15.755
you know, only to gain it back because I'm not created to be that skinny.

00:12:16.175 --> 00:12:19.175
I remember having an incident as a police officer where I was tossed.

00:12:19.375 --> 00:12:23.475
I had lost a lot of weight and the guy went to a domestic dispute This guy picked

00:12:23.475 --> 00:12:26.935
us up, me and my partner up, and threw us across the room.

00:12:27.315 --> 00:12:31.275
And that showed that skinniness should not be, I should not be that skinny.

00:12:31.575 --> 00:12:34.055
Maybe I was too close. I don't know. But I remember that day.

00:12:34.155 --> 00:12:38.715
And from that day forth, I decided that I am built strong and no one ever will

00:12:38.715 --> 00:12:41.195
pick me up and toss me across the room.

00:12:41.495 --> 00:12:45.635
Another one is imitate others instead of developing who God created them to be.

00:12:45.735 --> 00:12:49.575
We have our, especially if you're a church-going person, we have the people

00:12:49.575 --> 00:12:51.395
we follow around all day long.

00:12:51.875 --> 00:12:57.815
From Instagram to their Facebook. We just follow them and we want to have our identity like them.

00:12:57.975 --> 00:13:03.375
But God says, I've created you to be different. I created you to be unique, you know?

00:13:03.515 --> 00:13:07.955
And I didn't realize that because we do have a habit of creating idols within

00:13:07.955 --> 00:13:10.355
the church, idols within the world.

00:13:10.475 --> 00:13:13.555
And we begin to mold ourself like them.

00:13:13.955 --> 00:13:16.735
It's this person, I think, I don't know what's called, Berkey or whatever.

00:13:16.915 --> 00:13:20.555
And those persons cost over thousands and thousands of dollars.

00:13:20.555 --> 00:13:25.795
And so women are out there doing strange things for some money to get to carry a purse.

00:13:26.095 --> 00:13:28.035
How many of us women, we really are truthful.

00:13:28.395 --> 00:13:32.215
We've been there. We got purses in our closet that we do not carry.

00:13:32.435 --> 00:13:36.435
We thought at that time it was something we needed, but we did not need it.

00:13:36.555 --> 00:13:39.595
We wanted it and we got it and we just put it on the shelf.

00:13:39.735 --> 00:13:41.955
We probably carry that purse one or two times.

00:13:42.115 --> 00:13:46.075
But yet at the end of the day, guess what? It didn't mean anything after a while

00:13:46.075 --> 00:13:50.455
because it wasn't from the heart and it wasn't from God. You know,

00:13:50.515 --> 00:13:51.875
it was something that we wanted.

00:13:52.035 --> 00:13:56.575
We wanted to imitate like we had it going on with whatever person that was designer

00:13:56.575 --> 00:13:58.235
at that time as we were growing up.

00:13:58.834 --> 00:14:04.854
Another thing, we chase validation instead of truth. We want to be validated, even if it's a lie.

00:14:05.074 --> 00:14:08.654
We want people to like us, even if it's not true, right?

00:14:08.894 --> 00:14:11.694
And what that causes in us is exhaustion.

00:14:12.054 --> 00:14:18.934
We try to compete with images, lifestyles, and expectations that were never assigned to us.

00:14:19.034 --> 00:14:22.234
We want to be something that God never calls us to be.

00:14:22.374 --> 00:14:27.594
We want to perpetrate the fraud over here in America. It means faking and shaking

00:14:27.594 --> 00:14:29.554
because someone else has it.

00:14:29.714 --> 00:14:35.294
And what that does is it blinds us to the gifts that's already on the inside of us.

00:14:35.394 --> 00:14:40.554
Instead of nurturing our purpose, our gifts, our calling, we spend many years

00:14:40.554 --> 00:14:42.974
trying to become someone else.

00:14:43.114 --> 00:14:48.674
Even to the point of, you know, my hair grows long naturally if I just leave it alone.

00:14:48.814 --> 00:14:51.954
And all of us can grow hair. Our hair can grow as long as we want.

00:14:51.954 --> 00:14:56.234
But through that process of trying to fast forward it, we'll do weaves,

00:14:56.374 --> 00:15:01.514
wigs, and sew-ins, and tie-ins, and all the things that really add length to

00:15:01.514 --> 00:15:03.954
our hair for that temporary vanity.

00:15:04.154 --> 00:15:08.874
And not realizing that that vanity, which I see a lot of women has now,

00:15:09.054 --> 00:15:11.894
is the edges are gone. They're losing their hair.

00:15:12.694 --> 00:15:16.974
They're coming out, not just shedding, but coming out from the root because

00:15:16.974 --> 00:15:20.874
the braids are too tight or they're too heavy for your type of hair.

00:15:20.874 --> 00:15:25.394
So we spend years trying to be somebody that we're not, and we spend those other

00:15:25.394 --> 00:15:27.814
years trying to get back our identity.

00:15:27.934 --> 00:15:31.874
If you lost your hair during that time, pray that God will grow it out.

00:15:31.954 --> 00:15:36.134
Because I remember I was doing those little tiny, little tiny braids.

00:15:36.234 --> 00:15:39.614
And when you lose a tiny braid like that, like a little thin,

00:15:39.874 --> 00:15:43.034
micro thin braid, you're pulling that hair out from the root.

00:15:43.234 --> 00:15:45.654
So what happens is it's going to pull from the front.

00:15:46.285 --> 00:15:50.645
And a little bit from the sides. And so now you don't have hair to grow back

00:15:50.645 --> 00:15:53.085
because you've pulled it from the root.

00:15:53.265 --> 00:15:58.785
It took like five, almost, I think about 12 to 15 hours or more to get those braids in.

00:15:59.125 --> 00:16:03.205
They're cute when they're in. They're like, wow, hell to take them out.

00:16:03.325 --> 00:16:06.005
But for those three or four months, you're looking cute.

00:16:06.145 --> 00:16:10.225
But every time you take that braids out and every time you put it back in underneath

00:16:10.225 --> 00:16:12.605
that tension, you're losing your hair.

00:16:12.865 --> 00:16:17.765
And so God wants us to identify who we are. So one time I had the long braids

00:16:17.765 --> 00:16:24.605
and then I got so tired of getting it done that I actually cut my hair off short, kind of like a boy cut.

00:16:24.825 --> 00:16:28.345
And I used, I love that haircut. You know, I love that haircut.

00:16:28.745 --> 00:16:32.745
You know, God wants us to have hair. Bible says that to identify us from men.

00:16:32.885 --> 00:16:38.305
But during that time, I had the short hair and I love that short hair.

00:16:38.465 --> 00:16:41.445
And I just washed it. You can take a shower and wash your hair.

00:16:41.665 --> 00:16:44.445
Everything's clean all at once. When you have long hair, you got to go through

00:16:44.445 --> 00:16:45.805
a whole process getting your hair done.

00:16:45.985 --> 00:16:51.405
But what am I saying? I'm saying God desires us to understand what he's caused

00:16:51.405 --> 00:16:56.605
us to be, understand who we are in him and what our gifts and callings are so

00:16:56.605 --> 00:16:59.145
that we do not spend that much time on

00:16:59.446 --> 00:17:03.406
the image, you know, the worldly image. You know, a lot of times God,

00:17:03.586 --> 00:17:06.946
many times God doesn't want us trapped in a comparison.

00:17:07.146 --> 00:17:09.966
Lion does not compare itself to other animals.

00:17:10.206 --> 00:17:14.726
It knows he has strength. Likewise, God's people must stop measuring themselves

00:17:14.726 --> 00:17:18.266
against others and rediscover who they are through him.

00:17:18.466 --> 00:17:23.826
Many people are suffering not because they lack value, but because they have forgotten who they are.

00:17:24.066 --> 00:17:27.606
Their identity is not from social, not found in social media,

00:17:27.606 --> 00:17:33.146
popularity, rejection, failures, titles, relationships, trauma, or even public opinion.

00:17:33.386 --> 00:17:37.446
Your identity is found in the one who created you.

00:17:37.866 --> 00:17:42.486
Jeremiah 1.5 tells us, before I formed thee in the belly, I knew thee.

00:17:42.926 --> 00:17:46.046
So who should we go for identity when we have identity crisis?

00:17:46.186 --> 00:17:47.426
We should go to the creator.

00:17:47.966 --> 00:17:52.546
Psalms 1.39, 13 and 14 tells us, you are created my innermost being.

00:17:52.546 --> 00:17:55.326
You knitted me together in my mother's womb.

00:17:55.666 --> 00:17:59.646
And Romans 12, 12 said, do not be conformed to the patterns of this world,

00:17:59.766 --> 00:18:03.146
but be transformed by the renewing of your mind.

00:18:03.306 --> 00:18:06.346
That tells us right where we should be, right?

00:18:06.566 --> 00:18:10.406
That our identity is found in Christ.

00:18:10.586 --> 00:18:13.546
When I was younger Christian, I didn't quite understand that.

00:18:13.686 --> 00:18:19.986
But as I've matured, I realized, and I realized that,

00:18:20.620 --> 00:18:25.080
It does take faith to believe that, but I'm telling you, once you believe that,

00:18:25.260 --> 00:18:26.560
you'll develop a confidence.

00:18:26.760 --> 00:18:30.960
Whether you wear your hair short, short, or long, long, it wouldn't even matter

00:18:30.960 --> 00:18:34.520
because number one, if you have faith, God can grow that hair out.

00:18:34.940 --> 00:18:39.120
Number two, if you have that look and that's what you like, then you wear it probably.

00:18:39.360 --> 00:18:42.840
Those were created for, I call wigs and weaves accessories.

00:18:43.000 --> 00:18:47.000
They are accessories, right? But they don't define who you are.

00:18:47.000 --> 00:18:50.660
You are that person without all the extras.

00:18:50.880 --> 00:18:57.520
You are that person who identifies with Christ. You are the person who is fearlessly and wonderfully made.

00:18:57.660 --> 00:19:00.120
And you are that person who fears the Lord.

00:19:00.400 --> 00:19:03.820
So how do we lose our identity? Many people lose their identity.

00:19:04.740 --> 00:19:09.400
It doesn't happen overnight. It's a process. It happens through life, right?

00:19:09.660 --> 00:19:13.340
Through our wounds, through pressure, through fears, through our experiences,

00:19:13.460 --> 00:19:16.520
through comparison, through rejection.

00:19:17.000 --> 00:19:22.220
And the constant need to be accepted. Identity begins to fade when people spend

00:19:22.220 --> 00:19:27.000
more time listening to the voices of the world than the voice of God.

00:19:27.000 --> 00:19:28.600
How many know that to be true?

00:19:28.840 --> 00:19:33.880
We can lose our identity by comparing ourselves to others, constantly doing

00:19:33.880 --> 00:19:38.620
that, always looking for the latest fads and outfits and makeup.

00:19:38.880 --> 00:19:41.940
How about finding out how God wants you to look?

00:19:42.080 --> 00:19:47.940
We can lose our identity through rejection and abandonment. too much of that, we lose our identity.

00:19:48.100 --> 00:19:52.080
We get caught up in our trauma of life. You can lose yourself through trauma

00:19:52.080 --> 00:19:54.080
and painful life experiences.

00:19:54.400 --> 00:19:59.740
There's this guy on YouTube who takes that, that beauty that that person had, he highlights it.

00:19:59.860 --> 00:20:02.720
I don't know what he does. He just, if I come in with locks,

00:20:02.840 --> 00:20:07.380
he'll take the locks out and I'll have this beautiful look with new makeup on.

00:20:07.560 --> 00:20:09.440
He does that. He takes that.

00:20:09.660 --> 00:20:15.240
I think it's especially his gifting is to change that trauma that you experience

00:20:15.240 --> 00:20:18.860
in your life to something beautiful. And that's what God wants to do.

00:20:19.160 --> 00:20:23.640
Unhealthy relationships, social media validation, trying to fit in

00:20:24.005 --> 00:20:29.225
everywhere, compromising value for acceptance, shame from past mistakes,

00:20:29.645 --> 00:20:34.325
cultural pressure and stereotypes, words spoken over us repeatedly.

00:20:34.885 --> 00:20:39.385
Spiritual attacks against the mind, becoming disconnected from God.

00:20:39.705 --> 00:20:42.985
Many people start changing themselves to survive emotionally.

00:20:43.465 --> 00:20:46.945
Over time, they begin to wear a mask.

00:20:47.294 --> 00:20:51.734
Oh, my gosh. I remember when I mask, I remember back when I was younger,

00:20:52.154 --> 00:20:54.734
makeup wasn't a thing, but now it is a thing.

00:20:54.894 --> 00:20:57.374
But back in the day, people didn't wear a lot of makeup.

00:20:57.774 --> 00:21:03.054
They put on just enough to highlight. You wouldn't know they had makeup on.

00:21:03.054 --> 00:21:07.054
But I remember one time I had put a little too much on and someone says,

00:21:07.354 --> 00:21:09.214
why do you have that mask on?

00:21:09.494 --> 00:21:10.694
And that happened when I was like

00:21:10.694 --> 00:21:13.934
about 17 or 18 years old when I was just learning how to put makeup on.

00:21:14.334 --> 00:21:17.274
And to this day, that still bothers me.

00:21:17.714 --> 00:21:23.074
I love my makeup, but I make sure it doesn't look like a mask.

00:21:23.314 --> 00:21:29.054
People do that smoky eye, eyelashes, everything they do is not them.

00:21:29.254 --> 00:21:32.374
It's like movie star status. And it's happening during the day.

00:21:32.374 --> 00:21:38.494
Makeup is fine, but you understand when it becomes a mask that hides who you truly are.

00:21:38.734 --> 00:21:44.274
Some people in the process of losing their identity, they become people pleasers, right?

00:21:44.434 --> 00:21:48.794
They become overly hard and guarded. You can't get past that.

00:21:49.074 --> 00:21:54.234
They become angry and bitter, insecure and fearful, prideful and painful,

00:21:54.634 --> 00:22:00.494
prideful to hide their pain, silent to avoid rejection, addiction to approval.

00:22:00.494 --> 00:22:06.374
The danger is that eventually the mass becomes more familiar than the real person underneath.

00:22:06.734 --> 00:22:12.674
Comparison especially steals identity because it causes people to focus on what

00:22:12.674 --> 00:22:16.334
they are not rather than what God has already placed inside them.

00:22:16.454 --> 00:22:21.614
A person can be gifted, intelligent, anointed, beautiful, and called by God,

00:22:21.774 --> 00:22:27.414
yet still feel empty because they are trying to become someone else.

00:22:27.414 --> 00:22:32.614
This is why many people struggle internally, even while appearing successfully.

00:22:33.187 --> 00:22:38.207
They are suffering. They have the face where they're looking like, hey, we got it going on.

00:22:38.307 --> 00:22:42.447
But then at the end of the day, when they take off their masks,

00:22:42.707 --> 00:22:45.867
when they take off their costumes, they are lost.

00:22:46.047 --> 00:22:50.667
And the enemy loves that, you know, because many people do suffer silently.

00:22:50.887 --> 00:22:54.387
They suffer silently and lose their identity because they lost their confidence.

00:22:54.867 --> 00:22:58.647
Their purpose, their discernment, their relationships, their decisions,

00:22:59.087 --> 00:23:01.687
their emotional health, their spiritual strength.

00:23:01.847 --> 00:23:06.447
If the enemy can distort, identify, he can influence direction.

00:23:06.807 --> 00:23:10.807
So think about that. When we are on a purpose and our heart is intentionally

00:23:10.807 --> 00:23:12.827
towards God, what happens?

00:23:13.067 --> 00:23:18.787
When we get off, we start to lose these things. We start to lose our confidence.

00:23:19.067 --> 00:23:22.187
We start to get lost in someone else's purpose instead of our own.

00:23:22.327 --> 00:23:23.727
We don't have discernment.

00:23:24.067 --> 00:23:28.427
Our relationships are not really as they should be. Our decisions are foggy.

00:23:28.647 --> 00:23:32.207
We're making them under pressure of angry. where emotional health,

00:23:32.427 --> 00:23:35.687
our spiritual strength, if the enemy can't distort identity,

00:23:35.947 --> 00:23:38.047
he can't influence direction.

00:23:38.347 --> 00:23:45.567
So whenever he distorts us, he becomes the manipulator of our life instead of

00:23:45.567 --> 00:23:46.547
God becoming a manipulator.

00:23:46.889 --> 00:23:50.929
Manipulator of our life. The serpent first attacked Eve, right?

00:23:51.089 --> 00:23:53.489
With what? With her identity.

00:23:53.749 --> 00:23:57.429
And then the Bible tells us that as a man thinks in his heart, so is he.

00:23:57.629 --> 00:24:01.409
So whatever you're thinking in your mind, you start to become.

00:24:01.609 --> 00:24:06.469
And so if we're not saying the right words, we're creating a false image, right?

00:24:06.629 --> 00:24:13.209
The serpent first attacked Eve's perception and identity before sin even entered into her.

00:24:13.569 --> 00:24:16.829
You are, God wants to keep you from being like him.

00:24:17.009 --> 00:24:20.649
When she knew her identity, it wouldn't have been blurry, right?

00:24:20.809 --> 00:24:22.109
She wouldn't have had any security.

00:24:22.369 --> 00:24:27.329
She could have told the whoever animal that was talking to her to get thee behind

00:24:27.329 --> 00:24:30.069
me, right? But no, she entertain it.

00:24:30.209 --> 00:24:34.969
When our identity is off, we entertain the wrong things.

00:24:35.129 --> 00:24:37.929
And I know I can raise my hand right now. that's to be true.

00:24:38.149 --> 00:24:41.229
When we are on, we avoid a lot of drama.

00:24:41.429 --> 00:24:47.569
When we are off as far as knowing who we are in Christ, we can get caught up in a lot of things.

00:24:47.709 --> 00:24:51.189
But God says, don't worry about that. I will restore you.

00:24:51.469 --> 00:24:58.909
God restores identity by renewing the mind, healing words, breaking an agreement with lies.

00:24:59.209 --> 00:25:03.309
Come on now, God will actually teach you the truth. He'll rebuild your confidence

00:25:03.309 --> 00:25:06.649
and reminds people who they are in him.

00:25:06.849 --> 00:25:10.949
The lion of the tribe of Judah never intended for his people to

00:25:10.988 --> 00:25:16.108
to be disconnected from their true identity. How do we become disconnected?

00:25:16.508 --> 00:25:20.988
I like the word distracted. We become distracted. We spend more time looking

00:25:20.988 --> 00:25:24.728
on YouTube, trying to find out what the latest fashion is or what's the latest

00:25:24.728 --> 00:25:28.488
gossip, and we forget that God wants us to focus in on him.

00:25:28.688 --> 00:25:32.708
It's okay to know what's going on around you, but I always ask myself after

00:25:32.708 --> 00:25:37.548
I get caught up in something that may be interesting to me because I like to

00:25:37.548 --> 00:25:42.048
be nosy, and then I realize at the end of that, hour-long show.

00:25:42.188 --> 00:25:43.348
It had nothing to do with me.

00:25:43.708 --> 00:25:46.568
Matter of fact, it made me feel a little bit more insecure, right?

00:25:46.648 --> 00:25:51.108
Because I'm trying to compare myself or I become prideful. I'm glad I'm not like them.

00:25:51.328 --> 00:25:55.568
It does two, one or two things, right? So how do we secure ourself with Christ?

00:25:55.768 --> 00:25:59.028
Our identity with Christ is found in the scripture.

00:25:59.328 --> 00:26:03.008
And I read some of these before. I'm just going to do a brief summary of each one.

00:26:03.268 --> 00:26:09.568
Ephesians 2.10 tells us, for we are God's handiwork created in Christ Jesus to do good works.

00:26:09.748 --> 00:26:15.188
1 Peter 2.9 says, but we are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation.

00:26:15.388 --> 00:26:19.388
Romans 8.37 says, and all these things, we are more than conquerors through

00:26:19.388 --> 00:26:23.208
him that love us. If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation.

00:26:23.528 --> 00:26:28.608
Galatians 2.20, it is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me.

00:26:28.948 --> 00:26:35.948
And in John 1.12, to all who received him, he gave the right to become the children of God.

00:26:36.148 --> 00:26:40.768
Isaiah 43, which I love, is 33.1. It says, Fear not, for I have redeemed you.

00:26:40.868 --> 00:26:46.288
I have called you by name, and you are mine. We have to open up the Word of

00:26:46.288 --> 00:26:47.868
God to find our identity.

00:26:48.128 --> 00:26:51.088
We cannot look into the world. We can't look at the world.

00:26:51.268 --> 00:26:57.348
We can't even ask our friends or our mama, our mothers, even though Mother's Day is past.

00:26:57.688 --> 00:27:04.388
We can't even go to them. We have to go to the Creator so that we can live connected

00:27:04.388 --> 00:27:07.468
to Him and that we will understand our true identity.

00:27:07.838 --> 00:27:13.018
Those scriptures are powerful, powerful. How does this relate to the topic we're discussing?

00:27:13.278 --> 00:27:16.778
We're identity tips for lions and the ladies.

00:27:16.998 --> 00:27:22.278
Listen, the lion, look at what the lion does. Walk with discipline and not pride.

00:27:22.558 --> 00:27:27.998
Even though that lion, know that the lions, the lioness, they walk with discipline, not pride.

00:27:28.238 --> 00:27:33.618
Even when you see the little baby cubs walking. I remember I saw the baby cubs

00:27:33.618 --> 00:27:38.358
walking and they're walking. If it's a male, you can see he's walking like his dad.

00:27:38.518 --> 00:27:43.118
Because the female, she's walking like her, you know. And so it's like they

00:27:43.118 --> 00:27:45.878
are coming out already ready for the world.

00:27:46.158 --> 00:27:50.878
The walk is there. And we know women, it's in the walk, right? It's in the talk.

00:27:51.078 --> 00:27:55.658
But when you see the little baby lions and how they walk, you will be amazed

00:27:55.658 --> 00:28:01.838
that they're already walking in that lioness or lion footsteps already.

00:28:02.078 --> 00:28:06.418
They're born like that. When we are reborn, when we accept Jesus Christ as our

00:28:06.418 --> 00:28:11.058
Lord and Savior, we begin to walk and talk like Jesus. We do.

00:28:11.258 --> 00:28:14.838
You say, that's a different walk. That's a different talk because I've been

00:28:14.838 --> 00:28:19.138
spending time with my Lord. I begin to be more and more like him, right?

00:28:19.358 --> 00:28:22.598
We begin to lead with integrity as a lioness.

00:28:22.738 --> 00:28:25.858
We'll speak life over ourselves and our family.

00:28:25.978 --> 00:28:31.838
No more negative words. We don't allow anger or ego or lust to define our identity

00:28:31.838 --> 00:28:34.178
or even be the voice that comes out.

00:28:34.258 --> 00:28:39.578
Because when we're in those anger or ego or lust, our language even changes. We won't allow that.

00:28:39.918 --> 00:28:44.558
A real lion protects, provides, and stands firm in truth. Ladies,

00:28:44.818 --> 00:28:47.198
your value is not determined by attention.

00:28:47.698 --> 00:28:51.958
Stop shrinking to fit places, God, that you outgrew.

00:28:52.118 --> 00:28:57.518
My gosh, it's interesting. It feels uncomfortable when you have, maybe you have,

00:28:57.899 --> 00:29:01.819
You stop hanging at the bars and the clubs or going out to parties.

00:29:02.059 --> 00:29:05.099
And then all of a sudden, your friends invite you to an event.

00:29:05.279 --> 00:29:11.299
And the event might not be at the bar, but it'd be an office or a space in the bar area.

00:29:11.499 --> 00:29:15.139
And yet you feel so uncomfortable because I don't do bars.

00:29:15.479 --> 00:29:18.599
If you have an event at the bar, you won't see me there.

00:29:18.699 --> 00:29:21.799
If you have an event that serves drinks and wines or whatever you're doing,

00:29:22.019 --> 00:29:24.759
I won't be there because I have outgrown that.

00:29:25.039 --> 00:29:28.999
Why would I go back into a place that I've outgrown? You want to go to the park

00:29:28.999 --> 00:29:31.819
and there's no liquor being served? I might come.

00:29:32.019 --> 00:29:35.719
Depends on what the audience is. I leave myself open to options.

00:29:35.999 --> 00:29:39.439
I'm not committed to anything until I show up. If I don't show up,

00:29:39.679 --> 00:29:41.079
then I'm not there, right?

00:29:41.719 --> 00:29:47.859
Also, ladies, our confidence can become arrogance when we do have identity with Christ.

00:29:48.079 --> 00:29:52.059
What we begin to do is begin to look down at other people because they're not

00:29:52.059 --> 00:29:54.119
like you because you're walking with Christ.

00:29:54.259 --> 00:29:57.819
And that's not your job. Your job is to bring others along.

00:29:58.219 --> 00:30:02.319
God doesn't like that. You might feel a thump on the back of your head when you do that.

00:30:02.619 --> 00:30:05.499
Another thing, a virtuous woman knows her worth. Why?

00:30:05.739 --> 00:30:09.739
Because she didn't build it. It's established in Christ. When we build our own

00:30:09.739 --> 00:30:12.639
worth and we're not connected to the world, we're not connected to God,

00:30:12.819 --> 00:30:17.179
we think we've done it all in our hands, not knowing that it's God working behind

00:30:17.179 --> 00:30:19.819
the scenes to make all things possible for you.

00:30:20.199 --> 00:30:24.899
I want to talk about this identity crisis that women face.

00:30:25.689 --> 00:30:31.009
Based off what the Proverbs 31 says. I hear people say, the Proverbs 31 woman

00:30:31.009 --> 00:30:33.129
is so busy, I don't think I can do all that.

00:30:33.329 --> 00:30:37.449
I discussed that in the beginning of the last episode, is that your life is

00:30:37.449 --> 00:30:39.729
not created as a Proverbs 31 woman.

00:30:39.909 --> 00:30:46.329
Those are outlines, not outliers, outline of what God was an example of a versus woman.

00:30:46.769 --> 00:30:50.409
God saw that and he said, you know what, that's a great outline we can use for

00:30:50.409 --> 00:30:53.349
other women. Let's break it down on what it really means.

00:30:53.609 --> 00:30:56.769
You know, a lot of times we struggle. Women are struggling today with identity

00:30:56.769 --> 00:31:01.729
because the world keeps changing the definition of what a woman is supposed to be.

00:31:02.311 --> 00:31:09.131
Our moment of culture tells us in this world that we have to be independent at all costs.

00:31:09.491 --> 00:31:14.071
They mean we're working from the break of dawn to the break of the day,

00:31:14.311 --> 00:31:17.771
to the break of the evening light, right? Never need anyone.

00:31:18.031 --> 00:31:19.751
Chase beauty over character.

00:31:20.171 --> 00:31:21.871
Value attention over wisdom.

00:31:22.311 --> 00:31:27.991
Compete instead of nurture and perform instead of heal. Appear powerful instead

00:31:27.991 --> 00:31:29.671
of becoming spiritually grounded.

00:31:30.271 --> 00:31:34.091
We're all faced, like I said, we all wear a mask.

00:31:34.311 --> 00:31:40.071
And so if this is one of the masks that you're wearing, God is asking you to just take it off.

00:31:40.311 --> 00:31:43.031
You don't have to be independent at all costs.

00:31:43.331 --> 00:31:47.511
Why? People say, I don't need a man. Well, you were born because of a man.

00:31:47.551 --> 00:31:49.431
So you did need him for that, right?

00:31:49.611 --> 00:31:54.251
So as a result, many women are exhausted, trying to become everything for everybody

00:31:54.251 --> 00:31:56.611
while secretly feeling disconnected themselves.

00:31:56.871 --> 00:32:01.011
And that's what people think the Proverbs 31 woman means. that we got to do more.

00:32:01.191 --> 00:32:04.791
We got to do more. So people turn off that scripture because it sounds like

00:32:04.791 --> 00:32:08.751
it's a lot going on with this lady and I don't have enough energy to do it again.

00:32:08.971 --> 00:32:13.171
So that's why I wanted to show you like, what does the culture say about that?

00:32:13.491 --> 00:32:15.371
You know, let's continue.

00:32:15.731 --> 00:32:21.771
That's why women describes in 31 is so important. She doesn't represent a perfect woman.

00:32:21.951 --> 00:32:24.851
She represent a woman who knows her identity.

00:32:25.151 --> 00:32:28.811
See what I'm saying? Her identity wasn't Christ. It wasn't in her clothes she

00:32:28.811 --> 00:32:31.771
wore. It wasn't in the clothes she made. It wasn't what she bought.

00:32:32.111 --> 00:32:36.631
No, it wasn't even how she looked because they didn't describe what she looked like.

00:32:36.933 --> 00:32:42.633
In the Proverbs 31. Her identity became because it was secure.

00:32:42.873 --> 00:32:47.513
She was not insecure, but she was rooted in wisdom, purpose,

00:32:47.973 --> 00:32:53.233
discipline, faith, dignity, and trust in God, not a public validation.

00:32:53.913 --> 00:33:00.573
So we see here that her trust wasn't in the world's identity, but it was in God.

00:33:00.853 --> 00:33:08.813
So how do we relate Proverbs 31 to the true identity in our theme, lioness and the ladies.

00:33:09.113 --> 00:33:12.513
Number one, her identity was rooted in character, not attention.

00:33:13.113 --> 00:33:18.473
Today, many women are pressured to build identity around what they look like.

00:33:18.593 --> 00:33:24.953
We cover that in the single life story podcast, followers, relationships,

00:33:25.373 --> 00:33:29.173
popularity, sensuality, and an outside validation.

00:33:30.053 --> 00:33:31.953
But Proverbs 31 shifts to focus

00:33:31.953 --> 00:33:37.673
back to your inner life, your inner character, where God develops you.

00:33:37.933 --> 00:33:42.733
We see here in Proverbs 31, 30, charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting,

00:33:42.753 --> 00:33:45.353
but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.

00:33:45.653 --> 00:33:49.593
This scripture reminds women that the beauty phase, sense change,

00:33:49.733 --> 00:33:53.793
and public opinion shift, but godly character remains.

00:33:54.113 --> 00:33:58.393
The true identity cannot be sustained by attention alone.

00:33:58.980 --> 00:34:03.320
And you can see that because people have these massive followings,

00:34:03.320 --> 00:34:08.720
but when their truth about who they are comes out and they lose their massive

00:34:08.720 --> 00:34:12.260
following or they exalt themselves higher than God,

00:34:12.600 --> 00:34:15.160
you'll notice they begin to disappear.

00:34:15.160 --> 00:34:19.700
You won't hear about them much anymore. There's not any growth.

00:34:19.880 --> 00:34:26.460
It becomes stagnant because they have took their time to make whatever the audience wants.

00:34:26.600 --> 00:34:28.760
And that's their whole life. What do they want? What do they want?

00:34:28.760 --> 00:34:33.400
You might have went viral on one episode, so you spend your whole other episodes

00:34:33.400 --> 00:34:36.960
trying to hit that viral mark and you lose your esteem.

00:34:37.100 --> 00:34:39.020
My goal is to preach the word.

00:34:39.200 --> 00:34:43.880
If it's popular, it is. If it's not, it's not. That's all the Lord told me to do.

00:34:44.154 --> 00:34:50.094
So watching those followers and watching, you know, how it rises and fall.

00:34:50.234 --> 00:34:52.494
People listen to it a little bit and they turn it off.

00:34:52.874 --> 00:34:55.634
Sometimes every word ain't for everybody, right?

00:34:55.834 --> 00:35:02.014
Sometimes it's meant for a particular person. So if I get one download that day, that was for them.

00:35:02.134 --> 00:35:06.594
It was for them. Because you can spend your life on validation and then you

00:35:06.594 --> 00:35:10.534
lose the connection with God. Spend a lot of time on that. Let's keep going on.

00:35:11.114 --> 00:35:14.334
Number two, she trusted God instead of competing with everyone.

00:35:14.574 --> 00:35:18.934
We talked about the Proverbs 31 women. And we talk about her comparison is one

00:35:18.934 --> 00:35:21.134
of the greatest historians of identities.

00:35:21.394 --> 00:35:24.634
Many women lose themselves by trying to compete with other women.

00:35:24.814 --> 00:35:30.334
It imitates social media lifestyles when we find out that the house they're in is not their own.

00:35:30.554 --> 00:35:34.254
If they're at an Airbnb or something, they pay a lot of money for it.

00:35:34.254 --> 00:35:36.414
So they must record all their things at this Airbnb.

00:35:37.154 --> 00:35:41.214
On a particular day, they can't get to Airbnb and you'll see them walking outside

00:35:41.214 --> 00:35:42.934
doing a podcast. You see what I'm saying?

00:35:43.294 --> 00:35:46.614
So we need to really be real about what we're watching.

00:35:46.834 --> 00:35:50.214
Remember, it's all a show. It's all a movie. Nothing's really real.

00:35:50.374 --> 00:35:51.554
Only thing real is Jesus.

00:35:52.054 --> 00:35:56.674
Compete with other women. Imitate social media lifestyles. Keep up appearances.

00:35:57.294 --> 00:36:02.954
Become unrealistic versions of themselves. But the Proverbs 31 woman was secure

00:36:02.954 --> 00:36:09.894
enough to walk in her own assignment. She understood that purpose is more powerful than performance.

00:36:10.334 --> 00:36:15.474
Proverbs 31.25 says she closed herself with strength and dignity.

00:36:15.854 --> 00:36:20.414
Strength and dignity comes from knowing who you are in God. Women who know their

00:36:20.414 --> 00:36:23.814
identity stop chasing every trend for validation.

00:36:24.154 --> 00:36:27.514
She understood her worth. I like this part. I love all of it.

00:36:27.574 --> 00:36:31.154
Don't get me wrong. When you understand who you're competing, when you.

00:36:31.631 --> 00:36:34.371
I love this. When you trust God, you don't compete with everybody.

00:36:34.611 --> 00:36:37.211
Number two, when you understand your worth.

00:36:37.451 --> 00:36:42.151
An identity crisis is often caused by what? We know we can list them in our little journal.

00:36:42.351 --> 00:36:47.071
It's often caused by settle for unhappy relationship. We settle.

00:36:47.211 --> 00:36:50.551
We know this relationship, this guy ain't for us, or we know our friends are

00:36:50.551 --> 00:36:51.811
stabbing us behind our back.

00:36:51.911 --> 00:36:55.031
But just because we don't understand our value and our worth,

00:36:55.391 --> 00:36:59.391
far more precious than rubies, we start to settle for unhealthy relationship,

00:36:59.731 --> 00:37:01.371
we tolerate disrespect.

00:37:01.511 --> 00:37:06.431
We seek love at all the wrong places and all the broken places.

00:37:06.431 --> 00:37:13.731
We overwork ourselves for acceptance. We lose our voice and we abandon boundaries

00:37:13.731 --> 00:37:17.731
all because we do not understand our worth.

00:37:17.891 --> 00:37:22.431
Proverbs 31.10 tells us, a wife of noble character who can find,

00:37:22.591 --> 00:37:24.791
she is worth far more than rubies.

00:37:24.971 --> 00:37:30.231
Her worth was not determined by culture. It was already established by God.

00:37:30.531 --> 00:37:34.491
Women who know their worth move differently. They walk differently.

00:37:34.671 --> 00:37:36.031
They speak differently.

00:37:36.331 --> 00:37:42.571
Number four, true identity produces wisdom and discernment. Identity confusion

00:37:42.571 --> 00:37:44.251
often creates instability.

00:37:44.631 --> 00:37:48.531
People who do not know who they are may constantly seek approval,

00:37:48.851 --> 00:37:53.171
struggle with boundaries, become emotional-led, attach themselves to unhealthy

00:37:53.171 --> 00:37:56.251
environments, lose peace trying to please everyone.

00:37:56.251 --> 00:37:59.811
But the Proverbs 31 woman walks in wisdom.

00:38:00.091 --> 00:38:03.531
Proverbs 31, 26 says she speaks with wisdom.

00:38:03.791 --> 00:38:08.691
Faithful instructions is on her tongue. A woman secure in her identity does

00:38:08.691 --> 00:38:15.071
not need chaos to feel valuable, does not need manipulation to be valuable.

00:38:15.491 --> 00:38:19.631
You hear what I'm saying? This lady, us, that we're growing and maturing into

00:38:19.631 --> 00:38:24.131
is rooted in character, not attention. We don't need attention. We get it, we get it.

00:38:24.171 --> 00:38:28.691
We don't, we don't. We trust God instead of competing with everyone else. God is.

00:38:28.976 --> 00:38:34.196
Owns the cattle on the hill, all of them. He's not broke. We just covered that.

00:38:34.396 --> 00:38:36.396
Number three, she understands her worth.

00:38:36.616 --> 00:38:40.536
And number four, her true identity produces wisdom and discernment.

00:38:40.876 --> 00:38:44.536
That discernment is powerful because it tells you where you should be,

00:38:44.636 --> 00:38:48.676
where you shouldn't be, who really has your back and who doesn't.

00:38:48.916 --> 00:38:53.656
The topic of true identity, what does that look like in our lives?

00:38:53.816 --> 00:38:57.056
True identity is not about becoming who cultural demands.

00:38:57.376 --> 00:39:01.996
We know that because people are popular one minute and second minute, they're not.

00:39:02.296 --> 00:39:07.956
I want a straight line of consistency in my life. I don't want to be up and down and all around.

00:39:08.116 --> 00:39:12.516
I want everything to kind of be just flatline. I can expect it.

00:39:12.836 --> 00:39:15.276
God wants to bless me. I might have a little, you know, raise,

00:39:15.496 --> 00:39:19.036
you know, when you follow like a heartbeat, you might have the heartbeat life

00:39:19.036 --> 00:39:22.376
or you might just have a straight line life. Just want something consistent.

00:39:22.596 --> 00:39:26.856
Identity crisis many women face today is deeply connected to what we already

00:39:26.856 --> 00:39:30.016
covered. It's comparison, rejection, trauma.

00:39:30.561 --> 00:39:34.481
Unrealistic expectations. You can circle that one because that's a big one.

00:39:34.661 --> 00:39:38.701
Social media pressure, broke relationship, confusion, bought purpose,

00:39:38.821 --> 00:39:39.941
disconnection from God.

00:39:40.421 --> 00:39:44.321
Proverbs 31 points women back to wisdom, purpose, discipline,

00:39:44.781 --> 00:39:49.481
faith, dignity, inner strength, trust in God and godly character.

00:39:49.721 --> 00:39:53.501
It reminds women that identity is not something you perform,

00:39:53.721 --> 00:39:58.221
it's something you walk in. We cannot be performance.

00:39:58.601 --> 00:40:03.861
Another one, reflection. The power of the third woman was not available because she was perfect.

00:40:04.121 --> 00:40:10.961
She was valuable, not valuable because she was perfect. She was valuable because she walked in wisdom.

00:40:11.181 --> 00:40:14.181
Many women are searching for identity in mirrors, relationships.

00:40:14.721 --> 00:40:20.441
Careers, trends, public approval, while ignoring the identity God already gave them.

00:40:20.561 --> 00:40:26.981
When identity is rooted in Christ, comparison loses power. insecurity weakens,

00:40:27.201 --> 00:40:34.241
discernment increases, confidence grows, and women stop apologizing for walking in purpose.

00:40:34.421 --> 00:40:41.221
Because the woman who knows who she is no longer needs the world to tell her she matters.

00:40:41.521 --> 00:40:44.701
Isn't that powerful? You don't have to have approval from men.

00:40:44.781 --> 00:40:46.821
You have to have approval from God.

00:40:47.041 --> 00:40:50.961
So how does the lion fit into this? The lion represents strength,

00:40:51.181 --> 00:40:54.241
authority, courage, protection, confidence, and identity.

00:40:54.461 --> 00:40:57.941
The lion does not wake up questioning whether it is powerful.

00:40:58.161 --> 00:41:02.481
It already knows what it was created to be. That's why the symbol of the lion

00:41:02.481 --> 00:41:04.601
connects so deeply to identity in Christ.

00:41:04.901 --> 00:41:09.621
Many people today are spiritually living like frightened sheep while carrying

00:41:09.621 --> 00:41:12.781
the heart of a lion inside of them.

00:41:13.001 --> 00:41:17.161
They have forgotten who they are because life trauma, rejection.

00:41:17.621 --> 00:41:23.521
Comparison, fear, and culture weakens their confidence and distorted their identity.

00:41:23.761 --> 00:41:27.841
But through the scripture, the lion symbolizes authority, boldness,

00:41:27.981 --> 00:41:29.841
rulership, spiritual strength.

00:41:30.246 --> 00:41:33.506
Right? So understanding how we represent the lion.

00:41:33.666 --> 00:41:37.686
So why would we walk around with our head down when the lion of the tribe of

00:41:37.686 --> 00:41:39.926
Judah already knows his identity?

00:41:40.126 --> 00:41:43.926
He walks in confidence, knowing who he is. And we know that from Revelations

00:41:43.926 --> 00:41:48.246
5.5, to behold the lion of the tribe of Judah.

00:41:48.426 --> 00:41:53.786
The lion of Judah represents victorious authority, power, and identity rooted in Christ.

00:41:53.966 --> 00:41:58.646
The lion and the identity crisis. What we don't know if you have an identity

00:41:58.646 --> 00:42:03.106
crisis because you have yet to commit with who? Your lion, Jesus.

00:42:03.506 --> 00:42:06.946
Many people suffer that because of identity confusion.

00:42:07.246 --> 00:42:09.866
They don't know who they are. They don't know why they're there.

00:42:10.066 --> 00:42:11.746
They don't know what they're created for.

00:42:11.946 --> 00:42:17.806
They don't even know who they are. A lion that forgets its strength may live beneath its nature.

00:42:17.966 --> 00:42:24.686
They will be attacked. You know that kingdom wilderness out there is not for the weak-minded. it.

00:42:24.806 --> 00:42:30.446
When that lion, that older lion gets old and can't protect his pride,

00:42:30.806 --> 00:42:37.306
the young lions come in and take over and they live a lonely life at the end of their great reign.

00:42:37.446 --> 00:42:41.806
And we don't want that. We want to live a long life and we don't want to have

00:42:41.806 --> 00:42:46.946
to lose our relationship with God because we decided to do it our own way.

00:42:47.548 --> 00:42:50.848
And a lot of times when you're out, when you're without covering,

00:42:51.088 --> 00:42:55.088
you live a life where people mistreat you. You live a life of fear.

00:42:55.248 --> 00:43:00.288
You live a life of insecurity because you're seeking to be liked by everybody, your people pleaser.

00:43:00.988 --> 00:43:05.048
You're always comparing yourself, changing things up so you can fit in,

00:43:05.128 --> 00:43:07.948
or wearing less clothing or wearing long clothing.

00:43:08.088 --> 00:43:13.088
It's always changing because you don't know who you are and you lose confidence in your purpose.

00:43:13.088 --> 00:43:18.788
So you spend your life just wandering like the lion who have grown old and cannot

00:43:18.788 --> 00:43:24.388
fight off the younger lions and loses his pride, who he's been with for years.

00:43:24.548 --> 00:43:27.028
Lions live a nice long time if they don't die in the wilderness.

00:43:27.428 --> 00:43:31.468
Think about that. We don't want that. We don't want to grow old and then be

00:43:31.468 --> 00:43:34.608
wandering in the wilderness by ourself because we lack.

00:43:35.107 --> 00:43:38.007
The discernment to disconnect with Jesus.

00:43:38.427 --> 00:43:42.107
This has been very powerful because when we look at someone,

00:43:42.347 --> 00:43:44.747
we can see who their identity is.

00:43:44.907 --> 00:43:50.587
And God has desired for us women, us virtuous women, to reconnect with him,

00:43:50.947 --> 00:43:54.707
reconnect back with Jesus, reconnect back with your lion.

00:43:55.087 --> 00:43:59.567
And so I want to do some powerful decrees. And you can repeat after me because

00:43:59.567 --> 00:44:05.007
I want this to stir in your heart. I decree that my identity is rooted in Jesus

00:44:05.007 --> 00:44:07.387
Christ and not in the opinions of people.

00:44:07.587 --> 00:44:11.907
I decree that every spirit of rejection, shame, confusion, insecurity,

00:44:11.947 --> 00:44:14.687
and comparison is broken off in my life.

00:44:14.847 --> 00:44:18.607
I decree that I will walk boldly in the calling God placed on my life.

00:44:18.767 --> 00:44:23.687
I decree that I am chosen, loved, redeemed, and set apart for God's purpose.

00:44:24.027 --> 00:44:29.807
I decree that my mind will align with the word of God and not in the lies of the enemy.

00:44:30.027 --> 00:44:34.447
I decree that I will no longer speak death, defeat, limitation,

00:44:34.467 --> 00:44:36.287
or self-hatred over my life.

00:44:36.387 --> 00:44:39.927
I decree that the Lion of Judah strengthens me with courage.

00:44:40.347 --> 00:44:42.087
Wisdom, and discernment and peace.

00:44:42.227 --> 00:44:47.307
I decree that my confidence comes from God and not from the worldly validation.

00:44:47.627 --> 00:44:54.067
I decree that I will rise above fear, comparison, jealousy, insecurities, and self-doubt.

00:44:54.207 --> 00:44:59.247
I decree that I will walk in authority, purpose, and holiness, and truth.

00:44:59.507 --> 00:45:02.027
Let's pray for our identity or restoration.

00:45:02.367 --> 00:45:08.307
Heavenly Father, in the name of Jesus, help us to see ourselves the way you see us.

00:45:08.447 --> 00:45:13.247
Tear down every lie, every wound, every false label, every voice that has tried

00:45:13.247 --> 00:45:15.967
to redefine our identity outside of you.

00:45:16.327 --> 00:45:23.007
Heal the places where comparison, rejection, trauma, shame, and fear causes us to forget who we are.

00:45:24.647 --> 00:45:29.307
Teach us to stop comparing ourselves to others and to walk confidently in the

00:45:29.307 --> 00:45:33.607
purpose you design specifically for us individually.

00:45:34.267 --> 00:45:38.307
Renew my mind and uproot every lie implanted by the enemy.

00:45:38.707 --> 00:45:44.127
Break every agreement with insecurities, confusion, and self-hatred, rejection, and fear.

00:45:44.347 --> 00:45:48.667
Help me to walk boldly in truth, holiness, wisdom, and purpose.

00:45:48.907 --> 00:45:55.347
Let my words align with heaven and not destruction. Remind me daily what I belong to.

00:45:55.727 --> 00:46:02.107
Teach me to walk as a lioness in courage and strength with the lion of the tribe of Judah.

00:46:02.327 --> 00:46:08.807
And as a lady in dignity, humility, and wisdom, and grace. In Jesus' name I pray. Amen.

00:46:09.287 --> 00:46:13.647
Thank you for staying with me for this lengthy podcast.

00:46:14.087 --> 00:46:18.987
Appreciate your time. This is your host Connie Morris and this is a Diary of

00:46:18.987 --> 00:46:23.527
a Black Woman podcast. I hope this bless you and I'll see you on the next episode.

00:46:34.442 --> 00:46:37.602
Family, thank you for spending time with me today.

00:46:37.882 --> 00:46:41.582
To every woman listening who has ever felt hidden, overlooked,

00:46:41.642 --> 00:46:44.002
or pushed aside, hear me clearly.

00:46:44.282 --> 00:46:48.822
God has not forgotten you, and neither have I.

00:46:49.182 --> 00:46:54.022
Now let's go before the Lord and close this out with a word from God,

00:46:54.242 --> 00:46:58.782
because someone out there needs this reminder today.

00:46:59.062 --> 00:47:05.842
Jeremiah 29, 11, verses 11 through 14. For I know the plans I have for you,

00:47:06.022 --> 00:47:09.622
declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you,

00:47:10.002 --> 00:47:12.282
plans to give you hope and a future.

00:47:12.562 --> 00:47:17.382
Then when you call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you,

00:47:17.622 --> 00:47:22.842
you will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.

00:47:22.962 --> 00:47:28.922
I will be found by you, declares the Lord, and bring you back from captivity.

00:47:29.362 --> 00:47:35.302
Father God, we thank you for your word, that it is true, that it is living, that it is for us.

00:47:35.502 --> 00:47:40.622
You said you know the plans you have for us, plans to prosper us and not to

00:47:40.622 --> 00:47:43.422
harm us, plans to give us hope and a future.

00:47:43.682 --> 00:47:48.042
So today we receive that, not just in our minds, but in our hearts.

00:47:48.182 --> 00:47:52.022
When we feel overlooked, remind us you still see us.

00:47:52.162 --> 00:47:57.502
When we feel forgotten, remind us you still have a plan. And when we feel hidden,

00:47:57.742 --> 00:47:59.982
remind us you are still working.

00:48:00.422 --> 00:48:06.022
Your word says that when we call on you, you will listen. So we call on you now. Hear us.

00:48:06.362 --> 00:48:10.462
Strengthen us. Guide us. Help us to seek you with our whole heart.

00:48:10.642 --> 00:48:13.702
Not halfway, not sometimes, but fully.

00:48:13.902 --> 00:48:18.342
And as we seek you, let us find you in every season, in every place.

00:48:18.868 --> 00:48:24.128
Even the hidden mind. Restore what was lost, renew what feels broken,

00:48:24.348 --> 00:48:28.908
and remind us that nothing in our lives is wasted in your hand.

00:48:29.128 --> 00:48:35.268
Lord, we trust you, we believe you, and we stand on your word. In Jesus' name, amen.

00:48:35.828 --> 00:48:39.828
This is Diary of a Black Woman podcast, and I'm your host, Connie Morris,

00:48:40.008 --> 00:48:43.928
and I'll see you on the next episode. Thank you.